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March 12, 2008 | mtg, humor
GOOD GAMERY ST. PATRICK'S DAY CONTEST CONTENT

Let's Talk About Wizard Fashion

by Basilisk, GoodGamery Correspondent

Welcome to the [card]Tolarian Academy[/card]! Today we're going to talk about Wizards.

Here's a good example of early Wizard fashion. The hat and vest are prominent, though the hairstyle and beard are a very rudimentary "let it grow out" style.
This old guy may look like a Sorcerer - but he's actually an old-fashioned Wizard! Take special note of the beard. In the years after this style, you'll see these protrusions move further up the sideburns until they rest atop the head of the average Wizard, growing all the while.

The maroon hat was an old style that faded away into obscurity, as did most other types of Wizarding hats.
One of the more distinctive early Tolarian Academy fashions, the chessboard shoulderpads are a highlight here in ash and crimson. Note the swept-out sides that are an evolution of the beard in our previous photo.
This is a popular style of Wizard glasses. The frames used to be made from brass, but more discerning modern buyers like to purchase darksteel frames.
An advancement in Wizard hairstyles, the shaved top and sculpted sides leave plenty of room for personalization - note that you can sweep the sides forward or out, and long sideburns fit in handsomly. Note the characteristic Tolarian Academy garb, including the ever-present chessboards.
Popular amongst more adventurous wizards, this armor has a multitude of transluscent cylindrical appendages.
Here is an example of a young Wizard who has Purelaced his hair. The elegant multi-colored robes bring to mind the five colors of magic. This is a popular style amongst Wizards because it implies that the wearer is adept at many types of magical spells.
Young Wizardlings (also known as younglings) grow out long braids until they become a master Wizard. At that time they clone out the braid and color their hair gray. Check out the crazy boots and purple pants. What a rebel!
This photo showcases two fashions. In the back is Urza, wearing the elevated hairstyle known as the "Windswept Heath". Traditional Tolarian clothes are replaced by a more subdued cloak and vest, and armored pauldrons instead of shoulderpads. In the front is a Wizard displaying a chained-up style that you normally only see in specialized Wizard nightclubs.
Yikes! This is a stripped-down take on traditional Tolarian dress. Chessboard shoulderpads are now mere straps, and the male wizard is replaced by a female one.
Chessboard shoulderpads, mana-colored bookmarks, wiry glasses, and an unkempt moustache. Truly a look to be remembered!
This is a style from just a couple years ago. How embarassing.
When Tolarian Wizards are out in the field, they like to wear plain, quilted shoulder pads and brown cloaks. Prominent also are the battle goggles, which keep red spells out of the Wizard's eyes.
During this era of Wizarding, the colors blue and red were very popular. Wizards traditionally wear very heavy vests to protect themselves from experimental disasters, and this Wizard has even taken extra safety precautions by tying together the loose beard hairs.
These students at the Tolarian Academy are wearing simpler versions of the traditional dress robes. They look like the plain brown robes of a travelling battle-wizard, because every class they take could be like a battle.

Here also is a variation of the chessboard shoulderpad - this one has triangles instead of squares. How many triangles are there? You may be suprised to find out!
This is an unusual Wizard, because he isn't wearing any boots! What isn't unusual is the blue vest with square patterns on the shoulders, the puffed-out blue trousers, the wild hair, and the leather abdominal armor.

Let's take a moment to analyze some Wizards from other schools.

Oh ho ho! This mirthful robe and cowl are the hit of the party. Big, forked beards are an evolution of the swept-out, split hairstyle that was all the rage last cycle. Hot Wizard accessories this season are filigreed monocles, thick bracelets, and large red gemstones. Remember, the bigger the shoulder pads, the better!
I think I'm turning Japanese! Arcane golden symbols, bamboo shoulders, and a contrasting red-and-blue kimono are striking in the warmer months.
Big flowing robes, bigger flowing beards! Earthy colors and natural accessories like horns and ropes are simply smashing together.
So what if you can't grow a beard? Simply put your Wizarding supplies somewhere else! The ears, the nose, and around the neck are all delightful possibilities. This practical look is held together by the yellow and black robes.

Now, let's take a timely walk into the Post-Tolarian era of Wizard fashion.

This early Post-Tolarian piece displays a reiteration of the golden era of large metal jewelry, multi-colored shoulder pads, and wispy hair. You can trace almost everything here to earlier fashions.
The discovery of a multi-purpose knowledge draught and depilatory led to this eye-popping style. Without any hair to show, Wizards at that time attempted to cover up their baldness with hats.

Since chin-hats didn't exist until much later, a special type of eyepiece was designed to show beards at any place the wearer desires. Multiple lenses could fold down to choose between different styles and colors.
"How tall can you make a hat?" A powerful question, and a powerful answer! This impressive item shows off a beautiful symmetry, offset by the intentional ragged look in the robes and pauldrons. Blue is the color of the day, with lush green and earthy yellow accents lending an excellent accenture to the outfit.
A dressier version of the previous ensemble, more subdued colors allow the Wizard's magical prowess to really shine. Rather than iron armor, this Wizard wears dramatic shoulder pads that connect to the base of the hat. This is a look that cannot be touched!
This Wizard's hat towers above all others, and the shoulderpads sprout more shoulderpads in a type of fractal transcendence.

Contrasting parallel and perpendicular lines compete with gold trim to make this the one of the snappiest dressers on this side of the planes.
We will end this article with perhaps one of the finest Wizards to ever don a Wizard hat. This throwback to classic headwear shows off an imposing blue and gold cone, with a companion cowl that reaches out in defiance of the very rules of gravity.

Enchanting around the Wizard's face is a team of wild, bushy eyebrows and sweeping moustachio. It's so long you wonder why he needs puppet strings in the first place.

Until next time...

CLASS [card]DISMISS[/card]ED!



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